i will be your shoulder, as you grow older...(courtesy of Mr J. Blunt)

me and my 'pretty sweet' wedges went out today. i was armed with my band aids for the inevitable blisters and felt pretty good...after several yards of walking i realized i needed to have brought my zimmer frame as well...suddenly the grocery store entrance appeared to be further and further away. i knew if i could just make it to the door i would be able to prop myself up with a shopping cart...i successfully accomplished the grocery shopping in twice the amount of time it usually takes me...but the real horror unfolded as i was paying my bill. as i looked down, i realized that the 'putting it on in a hurry this morning, fake tan' was doing a very nice job of appearing in splodges of orange all over my arm...this has taught me a very important lesson about fake tanning moisturizer, it is indeed as 'evil' as the original fake tanning creams and it does not go on well if you are trying to juggle breakfast, feeding pets, answering emails.

and what ever you hope by applying it, everyone knows you are trying to look like you haven't lived under a rock for the past six months...

anyway, i know that you did not come here today, dear readers to hear about Tif and her grocery traumas, oh no, i know that you were anticipating an exciting post about 'boxes'. this is the first of many 'boxes' this week..(silent prayer has just been sent out to my mail man to get all the said 'boxes' to my house pretty darn fast...) so let us begin...

"what's in the box, Tif?", well i thought you'd never ask, but since you have, it really does require a bit of explaining (surprise, surprise) before i reveal (doesn't that sound so exciting..) so brace yourselves it's another long haul...

i was born the youngest of four children and my diet consisted of two things, Chocolate Spread on toast and Luncheon Meat...this is not because my mother was an "ill trained parent" rather because i refused point blank to eat anything else...by the time i was nine they insisted i ate a boiled potato before i could have my Luncheon Meat...there were always tears that followed.

i have eaten this food all through my teen years, just adding in Mars Bars and French Fries for good measure. then i met my man, who proceeded to tell me all about the "fish that had been fed solely on Luncheon Meat and that they had started to grow extra bits to their bodies" article that he had read. needless to say, i haven't touch a slice since...but i do have a passion for chocolate spread on toast, and this had been my breakfast up until we moved to the states, seven years ago.

when we arrived it became clear that there were two things my man had not enlightened me on before we moved...#1. we were living in an earthquake zone (i did not find this out from him, i discovered it in the grocery store, as the earthquake hit) and #2 they do not have chocolate spread...they have 'nutella', but that is not CADBURY'S CHOCOLATE SPREAD...

and so for many a year i have existed on token jars that have come via family who came to stay (god bless them), i hide them so the kids can't find them (not the family, the jars, silly)...

but a 'happy day', the best kind of 'happy day' came last friday...a box for me sitting on the porch...my man told me it was to celebrate the success of getting into the newspaper...and this is why i choose to live with a man who often says "Tif, i haven't got any clean underpants", "we need to talk about the dinners, Tif" or phones me late on Christmas Eve, while standing in Antropologie with 'man blinkers' on and says "Tif, i can't see anything in this store that you would like"...

"living in fear, now she has laughed in the face of 'Mr Bad Luck' "~ Tif